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Saturday, April 21st, 2001
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1:29a - Fuck the system.
I got pulled over tonight. Its been about 3 or 4 months since I've been pulled over.
Yes, I got a ticket tonight.
Why? No insurance.
Do I care? Not really. I'll pay the $475 and be on my merry way.
Yeah... I get funny looks when I say that. Some people don't understand why a ticket like that doesn't bother me. At least, not until I explain it to them.
For starters, I'm male. That in and of itself almost raises my insurance. I think this is quite unfair.
Secondly, I'm under the age of 25. Another hike in my rates.
Most quotes I've gotten from insurance companies are about $200 - $250 per month.
Hrm... let me think about this. I pay a $500 ticket every 3 - 4 months. Or, I pay $200 - $250 monthly for insurance.
Either I'm no good at math, or I'd say that by not having insurance, I'm actually saving myself money. Not to mention the hassle of actually dealing with insurance companies.
I figure, I'm a good driver. I don't go racing around all over the place. So, any accident that I could be involved in is due to other people doing stupid things like trying to merge into me on I-5 (nearly every FUCKING day).
So... Fuck the system. This is the sort of reason I keep a savings account stocked with a small emergency fund. I'd much rather let the government waste my money than fill some fat insurance salesman's pockets with my hard earned cash.
At least the government will invest in a really nice toilet or something.
Now, it can be argued that yes, I do make enough to actually get insurance and not be hassled by cops for things like messed up taillights (the reason he stopped me in the first place tonight).
Sure, I could get insurance and just not worry about cops ever again (until I do something REALLY illegal).
The main point is. The longer I go without getting pulled over... the more money I save, and the better my quality of life.
Don't give me a bunch of "well, what if you're pulled over sooner than that" bullshit.
The fact is... I'm not. I drive well enough that I just simply don't get pulled over very often at all.
If I do actually get insurance... my quality of life diminishes. Such that instead of having a nice meal, I'm forced to eat cheaply.
Fuck that.
I dont' like ramen THAT much. I also enjoy being able to have a few decent toys.
If I end up getting a better job with higher pay, or a promotion... sure, I'll get insurance. Right now, there's just simply no good reason for it.
The government can have my $500. I'll fix my tail light. And in another three or four months, if I get pulled over again, I'll repeat the process.
As always, I play the game MY way.
Tangental thought: I'm half tempted to mitigate this ticket and spout this rant to the judge. Though, I'm not sure if the judge will fine me for contempt or reduce the ticket.
Give me a few days to think about that. I just might do it.
current mood:  contemplative
current music: Not a creature is stirring. Not even in my pants. (1 comment |comment on this)
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9:09p - Same shit, different day.
Argh. I don't know whether to be content with what I've got, or aggravated that its not what I want.
Let me start from the beginning. Today the girl told me something I was expecting. She just realized that she can't handle a relationship.
Duh.
I coulda told her that two weeks ago. But, I figured I'd give her the benefit of the doubt and let her decide what she could and couldn't handle.
So... I'll just tag another notch onto my belt of people that don't want any commitments.
I really can't blame her. It was painfully obvious that this was going to happen. I'm just glad that I was prepared for it this time.
So, I guess I've now got a decision to make.
See, she's cool with the physical stuff, just so long as there's no attachment.
Bah.
I don't want that. I don't want to just be someone's fuck toy.
I want something she can't give.
I want emotional closeness. I want to spend nights just snuggled up underneath a blanket, watching a movie and exchanging kisses.
I certainly don't want someone that just wants to drop by, strip, fuck, mop up, and wander off.
I don't want to deal with that empty feeling that is always present after something like that.
Dammit. Why the hell am I bitching about wanting intimacy? I'm the guy. I'm supposed to be the one that just wants to fuck until dawn without more than a half-dozen words passed between two people.
But... I don't want that.
I want to just curl up with someone and do nothing more than talk until dawn.
So... as I predicted a week or so ago... things with her will end, I'll continue doing what I do, and she'll move on and give me nary a second glance.
Oh sure, just as the previous girls have told me, "There's oh so many girls that would want you."
Yeah... that's nice. They want to use me for a cheap night's thrill and then wander off to the next guy.
Thank you, but no.
I just simply can't operate like that. Believe me, I've tried. Its caused me more grief than I am willing to deal with.
But... part of me just doesn't care. In some way I wouldn't mind having girls like that around because, at least I'd have some human contact then. As opposed to the NONE that I usually have.
My argument to that is... that its always over way too soon, and they never just want to be a little lazy and lay around together.
Maybe I grew up too quickly. Maybe I'm just looking for love in all the wrong places. Maybe I'm just an idealistic fool.
Who knows.
All I know is that I'm tired of dealing with sluts. I'm tired of dealing with people that just want me to "be normal." I'm tired of having to explain myself to every new person I meet because for some stupid reason, wanting to actually FEEL something is such a foreign concept.
Yes. I still hate people.
No, not anyone specifically. Just... people. Humans. The whole majority of the populace.
Its almost enough to make me want to enact some evolutionary reforms. Mmmm... boil a bicep, fry a thigh.
Das ist mein kampf.
current mood:  bitchy
current music: Rammstein - Mutter (Newest Album) (1 comment |comment on this)
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