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Friday, November 21st, 2003
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9:03a - Wake the fuck up.
In 1772, future signer of the Declaration of Independence Samuel Adams published a 43-page pamphlet officially titled Votes and Proceedings of the Freeholders and other Inhabitants of the Town of Boston. The publication was designed to address grievances with the Crown and stir people into active resistance to tyranny. It was submitted at a "Meeting of the Freeholders and other Inhabitants of the Town of Boston" on November 20, 1772 -- 231 years ago.
One of the sections of the Proceedings of the Freeholders publication was called A State of the Rights of the Colonists (a.k.a. Rights of the Colonists) and consisted of four parts. Three of the parts are published widely on the internet. The fourth, A List of Infringements & Violations of Rights, is not. No complete reprint of the List of Infringements can be found on the internet -- not even in the voluminous Library of Congress online archives. The U.S. Government Printing Office's Fourth Amendment web page says "the first statement of freedom from unreasonable searches and seizures appeared in The Rights of the Colonists and a List of Infringements and Violations of Rights." It was important then, and having it available is important now -- because many of the grievances of 1772 are now grievances of modern America, as you will see when you read the text below.
This textual version was taken from Merrill Jensen's Tracts of the American Revolution 1763-1776, pages 241-251 (1967, The Bobbs-Merrill Company, Inc.; Library of Congress Catalog Card Number 66-26805).
( Behind the cut: A List of Infringements & Violations of Rights. )
current mood:  awake (comment on this)
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9:13p - One of my all-time favorite rants.
Heads Need To Be Cracked In!
Ahead Of The Crowd
By Johan Hed
I know I speak for every organism that has ever existed on the planet when I say that heads need to be cracked in, fast. Cracking people's fucking heads in was my first love, and it shall be my last.
What else is there, besides cracking people's goddamn heads in? Not much: the march of days, seasons, dreams, love and lies. Sex, anxiety, getting by. Food, albums, murmurs and moods. Memories and plans, sidewalks and fruitstands.
And that's all fine, but like it says on my bumper sticker--and T-shirt and customized baseball cap and kitchen table (carved with a key) and bedsheet (scrawled with a Magnum marker): "I'd rather be cracking your bastard-ass head in."
Take it personally. I'm talking about everyone, including you. I'm very democratic. That's one of the things I like about me, besides that "thing" I have about cracking people's heads in.
This one guy whose head I wanted to crack in said to me, "Isn't what you really want to do is to bash people's heads in? How can you crack someone's head in?" Shit, man, that's exactly the kind of thing I'm talking about! Bash, crack, smash, whichever! Those are just words, and words are of no interest to me. What is of interest to me is cracking in the fucking, bitch-testicle, fucking head of every damn living thing on this planet that has a goddamn head! That's what I mean! That is very interesting to me!
Everyone I see practically says to me, "Please crack my head in for my own sake." They don't say it in those words, no. They say it in other ways, like in the way they dress, but I hear them. And I heed their cries. I'd be a bastard if I didn't!
Story of my life:
Mom: Oh, Johan, you look so cute in your suspenders!
Mom's head: Crack!
Dad: Johan, life isn't always going to be easy.
Dad's head: Crack!
Me: Maybe you shouldn't go around cracking people's heads in all the time.
My head: Crack!
Cracking heads in is the only image I can, or will ever, comprehend. It is the single action which resonates sensibly within the rhythm of this world. Hopes are dashed! Heads are cracked! People forget! Of course you don't understand! Which is why your head needs to be cracked in! You do understand? Are you among the kindred? Then your head needs to be cracked in even harder, friend.
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